Leave Them Alone

As a teacher, you always have your favourite topics to cover within your subject and for me, a personal favourite that was part of my A Level teaching over the past five years was a transcript of the groundbreaking BBC interview between Martin Bashir and Princess Diana in 1995, a time when Princess Diana’s relationship with the Royal Family  was particularly precarious following a very public infidelity from Charles and vicious rumours about her being passed from insiders to the unforgiving UK tabloids.

Much of my initial interest in this interview was because as an aspiring interviewer myself I am fascinated by the way in which questions and responses can be manipulated by both parties, particularly in a meeting as high profile as this one.  I am also a big fan of Diana and everything that she stood for.  But more importantly, I feel that it is a vital piece of history for young people as it sheds light on what it is like to be part of an institution such as the Royal Family, treated as an outsider, a place which it has become patently clear, is not a nice place to be. 

Whilst I am not a history teacher nor an expert on the monarchy, it was always amazing to teach the students who weren’t even born when Diana was here and see their perspectives on the situation.  Young people never fail to inspire when it comes to the insight that they provide. So When it was announced that Prince Harry and Meghan Markle would be appearing in an interview with Oprah to discuss amongst other things, their official departure as senior royals, dubbed by the press, “Mexhit”, something told me that this too would quickly become an important part of history and like the Diana and Bashir interview, may well be studied at some point in the future.  But these weren’t the only parallels that were visible in the two interviews.

The only thing more exciting to me upon finding out that I had access to the much anticipated interview 24 hours earlier than the UK as I am currently situated in the US time zone, was the  two hours that I spent viewing it.  My initial interest in watching didn’t come from any real attachment to either one of the interviewees. Despite being English with a mild intrigue when it comes to British traditions I have certainly never been particularly enamoured by the Royal family.  And I don’t know much of Meghan beyond some of the headlines that I have caught over the last few years and can’t say that I have really formed an opinion on her.  But as far as members of the Royal Family go, other than Princess Margaret who I loved and Princess Diana who I adored, Harry has always been my favourite.  For no real reason other than I had a bit of a hunch that he had a slightly more rebellious streak than some of his royal peers.  There seems to be a slight theme to the appeal emerging. But my main reason for watching was that I just bloody love Oprah.  And she delivered, as always in a brilliantly warm yet neutral interview style that, in my opinion, did a great job at minimising any bias.  Although there were some moments that it would be hard for anyone with an ounce of humanity to not show a personal response to, she largely kept as objective as possible, despite clearly having a pre-existing relationship with Meghan, which viewers were reminded of as she thanked her for her wedding invitation as they greeted one another.  

Another big motivation for watching was my ongoing interest in race relations.  Clearly one thing that has been consistent in the reporting of the Meghan Harry saga has been the racism and othering that she has faced throughout their relationship.  This union should have been an exciting moment for the progression of the Royal Family both in terms of the couple’s marriage but more prominently with the birth of their son, Archie.  Although much later than we would have hoped, the first person of colour in the modern times of the British Royal Family bloodline (historians believe the first Royal person of colour was Queen Charlotte, wife of King George III in the eighteenth century) should be a moment to be celebrated.  Sadly for many of the racists and trolls of Twitter  in this country, that was not the case.  And in a heartbreaking revelation, the most upsetting part of the interview in my opinion, was when Meghan recounted a conversation that Harry had experienced with a member of the Royal Family, who they both chose to keep anonymous, asking the blatantly racist question of what their first child would look like, specifically referring to how dark his skin might be.  To make matters worse, the couple were told that they would not be offered any security after the birth of their son as Archie would not be receiving the title of Prince.  The matter of security provision and who is entitled to it is complex to say the least but the situation reared its head again at the start of last year’s lockdown when the security that they were receiving in their temporary move to Vancouver was pulled at the last minute.  The couple who had been offered the home of American film mogul Tyler Perry to stay in, were also given the peace of mind of his security team, independent from the Royal Family.

Meghan began the interview by honestly admitting that she went into the relationship naively, with no real understanding of the day to day life of the job or the extent of the formalities that were required in all settings, including, what surprised her the most, behind closed doors in indoor settings, away from the prying eyes of the UK tabloid press.  It seems that the Royal Family are in a, as Oprah put it, “symbiotic relationship” with the UK press with a very real understanding that their public perception relies heavily on the way that the press presents them. A grim thought. Imagine if the way you and your personal life was perceived, understood and judged was being dictated by The Daily Mail.

As a successful actress prior to her marriage to Harry, Meghan is clearly comfortable in interview settings.  She glided through Oprah’s questions with ease, even when talking about what were obviously exceptionally distressing times for her, something that no doubt the press will use against her when dissection of the interview takes place in the coming days.  She explained the overwhelming feeling of being trapped, recounting a time when she wanted to go and meet her friends and was told that it would not be possible and that she was expected to stay on the down low for a while - at this point she had only left the palace twice in a four month period.  She went on to reveal how she had reached rock bottom, battling suicidal thoughts due to the way that she was being treated with no offer or even permission for any support.  Despite asking for it on numerous occasions, from, as she consistently referred to it as, “the institution” she was told to essentially just get on with it and that it was something that every Royal has to do at one time or another.  Her only regret, she ended the interview by sharing, was that she believed the institution when they promised that they would protect her which was plainly not the case.  

I’m sure that there will be much angry news coverage over the coming days.  The couple, particularly Meghan who has been the most demonised, certainly seem to be divisive and there will no doubt be criticism of Harry for admitting that he felt trapped and that his father and brother are also trapped within the confines of the Royal Family.  Even Oprah challenged him at this point asking how that could be the case when living a life of such wealth and privilege to which he reminded her and viewers of the fact that it is an inherited position, not a chosen one.  He also revealed that soon after refusing to take his phone calls, his father Charles cut him off financially, leaving Harry to use the inheritance left to him by his mother to support his family and their security needs, alluding to the fact that Diana might have predicted a need for such support, amplified by Harry’s admittance that he was worried about “history repeating itself”.   

Ultimately, the feeling that I was left with was more of a question.  Isn’t it time that we just left them alone?  Are we forgetting that they are people, whose feelings and emotions are just as valid as the rest of us?  There will no doubt be people who will challenge why, if they want a quieter life, away from the press, would they agree to such a high profile interview?  And whilst there is certainly validity in that viewpoint, I would argue that it seemed clear from watching it that there were some things that they needed to say, to clear their names if you will, after nearly two years of what could be deemed as slander. 

So from starting the interview from a position of neutrality, I can now say that I am happy for Meghan and Harry.   Not of course for the fractures that have clearly formed in their families from the events of the past few years, no one would wish that upon anyone.  But for their freedom to live a life of their choosing.  Ultimately that is something that on a human level we should all be entitled to.  They are, after all, just human beings, like the rest of us.  I think we could all do with being a little kinder.